P-R-O-C-R-A-S-T-I-N-A-T-I-O-N

It's always the same place. I'm sitting at a desk, looking around the room, trying to find a familiar face, but no one seems to know me. Realization hits--I'm in a classroom. It feels like a college classroom. Usually there is a periodic table on the wall or maybe a graph on the chalkboard. Gradually the details return to me. This is a class. A class that I am taking. Why don't I know anyone? Because I haven't been coming to class. I check my calendar. I've waited too long to withdraw without this going on my transcript. I don't even recognize the professor. Maybe I could talk to him...take the final and still pass the class...he could withdraw me himself...why did it have to be Chemistry again? How am I ever going to learn a semester's worth of material in time to pass the final that he's saying is tomorrow?

I'm worried about my transcript. How will it look to have this horrible grade sitting there? Will I get fired from teaching if I fail this class? What about my degree? Wait a second, my degree. That's right. I did get my degree. They wouldn't let me teach if I didn't have one. Wait a minute, I don't teach anymore. What's going on here?

Abruptly I wake myself from this nightmare and gasp with relief. Indeed, I did graduate from college. Years ago. I have had my career, and I'm staying at home now with our little boy. So, why did I have this dream? Why have I been having this dream at least once a week since I finished school?

This little scene has been popping into my subconscious rather frequently lately, and I decided to do some introspective psychoanalysis. I think that perhaps my mind is reminding me of something that I have known for years but have chosen to do little about: I am a procrastinator.

My procrastination hit it's peak during my college years when I realized that, indeed, if one consumes enough coffee one can function for a continuous 24 hour period. Therefore, why should anyone prepare in advance when a project can easily be done within hours of its due date? This actually worked for me, believe it or not, in my language and literature classes. I did very well although I was a bit tired most of the time. Science and math were not too forgiving, however, and I do believe that is why my dream always centers around those classrooms.

Why on earth am I talking about this on Motley Moms? Well, this dream continues to rear it's ugly head now because I'M STILL PROCRASTINATING. I still have unfinished projects that I'm putting off until later. I prepare for my toddler Sunday School class the night before. I run to the store late at night to get things I need for the next day even though I have had ample time to do it earlier in the week. I'm even typing this blog a lot later than I should be.

And I'm a mom whose son watches every move that I make.

If I'm not careful, those late night trips to a 24-hour Wal-mart for trash bags and diapers are going to become group project poster board expeditions. The word "now" won't mean anything to him if it doesn't mean anything to Mommy.

How do I break a bad habit that has taken me a lifetime to perfect? And how do I teach my son to use his time more wisely? Do you have any words of wisdom?

Have a blessed Sunday, and sweet dreams!

Soccer Mom: Truth, Lies, and Labels

According to Wikipedia, the term "soccer mom" was popularized the year I graduated from high school. 1996 was an election year, and the demographic of women voters deemed "soccer moms" was being targeted by Bill Clinton as the most sought after group of swing voters. An article in the Washington Post described the soccer mom as "the overburdened middle income working mother who ferries her kids from soccer practice to scouts to school," usually in a minivan, station wagon, or SUV. "Busy, harried, stressed out, and overburdened" were all used to describe the soccer mom demographic.

I remember thinking around that time, "I will NEVER be like that!" I even developed an aversion to minivans, just to be sure I avoided the soccer mom stereotype. Car companies agreed. After courting the "soccer-mom" image for several years, in 2003, the car manufacturer Nissan repositioned its Quest minivan as "stylish, sexy and desirable."

Well, after driving our 13-year-old Camry for the past 8 years, stooping and hefting two off-the-growth-charts babies into their car seats and shoving groceries around the crevices of the stroller in the trunk, a minivan is starting to look pretty good. My practical side is beating out my sense of pride.

And our son will play in his first-ever soccer game this morning. He's very excited. I'm organizing the team snack schedule this season and providing snacks for this first game. Luckily there is also a terrific "soccer dad" at my side, helping KID 1 learn the basics, getting him to practice, and rooting from the sideline right along with me.

Becoming a soccer mom is a gradual process, but I'm determined to define the label and not let the label define me! This soccer mom is fun, stylish, sexy, and desirable! Now where's my minivan?

What About Yo Frennzzzzz?

I think I've posted before about how blessed I am, that I really am living a charmed life. My husband is great and I have two adorable, sweet, healthy boys. I have family nearby who are almost always on call to provide free babysitting and I am involved in a tae kwon do school that nurtures me physically, socially, and spiritually. Oh, and I go to a wonderful church, too. My life is terrific, really. One way God has always blessed me is through friendships. In high school I had a tight-knit group of friends from both my church and my school. Even though most of these friends and I rarely talk anymore, having them still kept me out of a lot of trouble when I was younger. In college I had friendships that were even deeper and more beneficial, and I even had those kinds of friendships once I graduated and started teaching, especially with my two roommates, both of whom were in my wedding. I kept some of these post-college friends even once I married and had children, although some of them are single or married without children. My bestest friend lives in Vero and while we have a hard time catching each other on the phone, we visit pretty regularly. Another of my besties lives here in LW and thanks to AOL Instant Messenger, we talk pretty much every day. She and her mom also babysit my kids from time to time. Another good friend of mine is a nurse and has regular weekdays off, so sometimes she'll come over and we'll take the kids to lunch then play video games or watch TV on DVD while they nap. She's 10 years younger than me, but we get along fabulously. Facebook has made it easier for me to keep in touch with my current friends and people I haven't talked to or seen in decades. In addition to these wonderful people in my life, I now have my newest friends - my Mom friends. I see them at MOPS, at the playpark, and at playdates at various homes. This was the missing link, the piece of life puzzle that I didn't even know was missing. I admit that it's hard for me to make new friends and that when I first had Ethan, I didn't think I needed Mommy friends or MOPS. Boy, was I wrong. The friendships I have made through MOPS have given my life a new fullness. It's great for my kids, too; they now have playmates and other adults to love and who love them. So thank you, all of you. Thanks to those of you who knew me in high school or college, those of you who were in my wedding and saw me through the post-college/pre-Todd years, and most of all, just for today, thank you to my Mom friends. You all make me feel a little saner and a little less alone in the craziness of 24/7 childcare. And thanks for loving my kiddos, too.

Sodium Nitrites... what is that?

Now, let me start of by saying that I am absolutely NO AUTHORITY on health related issues. I'm a Mommy by profession and I am constantly learning as each day passes.

Have you ever wondered about this thing called sodium nitrate that is put in cold cuts, hot dogs and other food products? What in the world is it? Well, I decided to google it. When I did, all sorts of stuff came up and I tried to sift through it and then took a little break. My brain started to hurt.

The general gist of it is that it is a preservative and should be avoided if possible.

One of the sites I found (supermarket guru) says:

Sodium Nitrite helps prevent the growth of Clostridium botulinum, which can cause botulism in humans and is also used alone or in conjunction with sodium nitrate as a color fixative in cured meat and poultry products (bologna, hot dogs, bacon).

During the cooking process, nitrites combine with amines naturally present in meat to form carcinogenic N-nitroso compounds. It is also suspected that nitrites can combine with amines in the human stomach to form N-nitroso compounds.

These compounds are known carcinogens and have been associated with cancer of the oral cavity, urinary bladder, esophagus, stomach and brain.

Research in Sweden found that Swedes who ate on average 3 ounces of processed meat each day had a 15 percent greater chance of developing stomach cancer than those who consumed 2 ounces or less.

The Cancer Research Center of Hawaii and the University of Southern California reported in the Journal of the National Cancer Institute (2005;97:1458-65) that they studied 190,000 people, ages 45 to 75, for seven years. Those who ate the most processed meat (bacon, ham, cold cuts) had a 68% higher risk of pancreatic cancer than those who ate the least. "Most" was defined as at least 0.6 ounce processed meat, 1 ounce beef or 0.3 ounce pork per 1,000 calories consumed.

Dietitians suggest that you can help reduce the possible cancer-causing effects of sodium nitrite by consuming protective antioxidants before meals, such as vitamin C and vitamin E. But, remember, no vitamin offers 100% protection.

Now this is different from the Listeria concerns that we have regarding cold cuts and hot dogs.

Listeriosis is an infection caused by eating food contaminated with the bacterium Listeria monocytogenes, with an estimated 2,500 persons in the US becoming seriously ill and 500 of these resulting in death each year.

The disease affects primarily pregnant women (who are 20 times more likely to become infected and develop a severe illness), newborns, and adults with weakened immune systems.

The symptoms include fever, muscle aches, and sometimes gastrointestinal symptoms such as nausea or diarrhea. If infection spreads to the nervous system, symptoms such as headache, stiff neck, confusion, loss of balance, or convulsions can occur.

Infected pregnant women may experience only a mild, flu-like illness; however, infections during pregnancy can lead to miscarriage or stillbirth, premature delivery, or infection of the newborn. Healthy adults and children occasionally get infected with Listeria, but they rarely become seriously ill.

Listeria is killed by pasteurization and cooking; however, in certain ready-to-eat foods such as hot dogs and deli meats, contamination may occur after cooking but before packaging.

OK. Got that? My brain is really hurting now.

I guess if you really want to be careful what you should do is buy sodium nitrate free cold cuts and heat them in the microwave to kill any Listeria that might be lurking in there. Mmmmmmmm.

OR

Just be a vegetarian.

In case you are wondering what Boar's Head meats don't have sodium nitrites, I've attached the list for you at the top. You can also call them at their Nutrition Line at 800-352-6277 and they can send you info. This is a link that Boars Head has regarding nitrites http://www.boarshead.com/nitrites.php.

Slowing Down

Somedays I don't know which way is up. Seriously. I just seem to spend all my time spinning my wheels. I add more to my "To Do" list than I cross off. I juggle a lot of stuff.

Just like every mom I know.

One thing that has really been life changing is to make time just to be with my kids every week.

A couple weeks ago, I took my planning period and went to help with THE Princess's class study on Dr. Seuss. After reading The Foot Book, THE Princess and her classmates rolled up their pant legs and got their feet painted.

Then, they listened to the story being read again, acting out with their feet what they heard.

There was a lot of giggling. Paint went all over the place, but mostly on the paper.

This was a rare moment where THE Princess didn't mind getting dirty (painty, actually). We cleaned up by giving each child pedicures (tubs of warm soapy water to soak their feet in) while they waited to have their feet scrubbed clean.

Last week, we made no-cook play clay. It's easy and fun. THE Princess mixes hers in a zip-top baggie to minimize the gooeyness. KOTJ and I mashed it up with our bare hands. Our recipe makes a great kid-sized amount and the more you mash it, the better it is.

[Play Clay: Mix together 2 tablespoons water, 1 tablespoon oil & as much food coloring as you like in a cup. Mix 6 tablespoons flour and 2 tablespoons salt in another cup or bowl (or baggie). Dump it all together and smoosh! ]

In another turn of events, KOTJ has discovered our dog's water bowl. He has taken to dumping and playing in the water about once a day. I just keep a towel nearby and let him splash it up!

I'm trying not to sweat the small stuff.

What fun stuff have you been up to lately?

Happy Birthday Old Gal!

She's fabulous. She's fifty. She doesn't look a day over 17, and she has more plastic in her face than Joan Rivers. She's Barbie! Fifty years ago today, she was first introduced to America, and she has impacted our society in more ways than ever imagined.

I love this Barbie fun fact that I found at this web site (The Facts of Barbie), "If Barbie was human sized, she would stand 5 foot 6 inches tall, weigh 110 pounds, and have a 39 inch bust, 18 inch waist and 33 inch hips." In a culture where so much pressure is placed on size, looks and weight, I think it is safe to say that many of us have a love/hate relationship with the Barbie's of our world. As a mom of a very busy boy, I am so tired that I would rather spend 5 more minutes sleeping than primping, and let's not even mention the gray hairs and stress eating!! I myself feel especially glamorous on days when I actually blow-dry my hair and put on jeans instead of sweats.

In honor of her birthday, I think we Motley Moms should create a pact concerning beauty.

1. If you show up at a play date with oatmeal in your hair, I promise not to roll my eyes when you say it is a beauty treatment.


2. When you decide to go on Atkins to loose the pregnancy pounds from your five year old, I will not bring cookies, brownies or anything but celery to Bible studies, girl scout meetings and/or all play dates.


3. When you decide that Atkins isn't worth it and you love your curves, I will be the first to hand you a Mallomars or other confection of your choice.


4. When you FINALLY decide to cover your gray, I will smile and agree that "it must just be your new shampoo."


5. When you show up to MOPS without concealer, I will tell all the other mom's that you are just going "Goth". I'll say, "It's the latest rage in Hollywood. Katie Holmes is showing it off on the cover of People."

I am not sure if it is because I am older or wiser, but I am happier now with my looks than I have ever been. Maybe its just that I am too tired to worry with such things, or maybe my vision is just bad enough that I can't see the crows feet and wrinkles. I was in high school in the late 80s and early 90s, so my hair was under a lot of pressure back then - the perms, the Aqua Net, the rat-tailed combs. I haven't had a really bad hair day since I quit spending so much time trying to make my bangs defy gravity. That was also about the time I got married. I wonder if the two are related.

I hope you all have a beautiful Monday. May you get enough beauty sleep today, and if you are really lucky, maybe you will have time to blow dry your hair. If you didn't have enough Barbies when you were little, you can purchase a re-issue of the original at Target this week for only $3. I actually never had a Barbie, so I think I might get one today and see what I have been missing. Maybe she will inspire me to put on more makeup than just lip gloss.

21st Century Mom

How on earth did our parents parent us without the Internet?

I depend so much on sites like Babycenter.com and WebMD.com for answers to the questions I have NOW, like "Is it normal for him to...," and, "What should I do if..." I keep our family's calendar (which is pretty much our son's social calendar) on our computer, and I have that calendar synced to Google Calendar so that I can schedule playdates when we are away from home. I have immediate access to all sales ads so that I can instantly compare diaper prices when necessary, and if I don't have a coupon handy I can usually find one somewhere in Cyberspace. I shop for toddler clothes and children's books with just a few clicks of the mouse, and if I'm wary of purchasing that new tricycle without knowing anyone else who has one, I just check into the product reviews that others have provided. Can you imagine what life was like in the olden days before Amazon.com? (I was alive then, but it all seems like a big blur...)

Last night I took Internet parenting to a new low (or high, depending on your perspective). We have been having BATTLES in this household over dental hygiene. Our son doesn't mind the toothbrush, he just doesn't want to use it in the way it was intended. I have had too many dental issues to allow our son to follow that same path, and I watched a graphic 20/20 episode that involved baby root canals (you've got to be kidding me) so I was feeling pretty desperate to convince him to take care of his teeth. I considered showing him those same videos of screaming children that I had seen, but that could easily back-fire in a few years, so...

Thank you Youtube.com! Do you believe that there are parents out there who seriously take videos of their kids brushing their teeth and then post them to Youtube? I don't know that I would have ever thought of that, but no complaints here! I found a "playlist" of toothbrushing sessions (as well as clips from Sesame Street and a strange but effective clip from a French cartoon). Our son sat with me watching the monitor, and I handed him his toothbrush. Suddenly we were no longer concerned with the chore of cleaning those teeth, it was a toothbrushing party with toddlers from around the world! There was one unfortuneate incident that involved spitting at the screen (thanks, strange French characters), but otherwise this was the easiest and most effective teeth cleaning session that we have had since those little pearly whites started pushing through his gums.

Hey, I will take help anywhere I can get it! Do you have any secret weapons you use to parent more effectively?