So Long, Farewell

Auf Wiedersehen, Goodbye

I hate quiting almost anything except diets, of course. In fact, I had to quit my high school job at Claire's twice. The first time, my boss talked me out of it.

Sadly, my time at Motley Moms has come to an end. I would really like to sugar-coat this by saying, this is just a break; but the truth is, it is time for me to move on. My wonderful little boy keeps me busy in ways that are quite different than what most typical families face. I hope to find a place to share my stories with other special needs families.

I wish you all the best of luck, and please keep in touch on Facebook or via email! I am so glad our paths have crossed.

Love, Pam

Mixed Metaphors of Motherhood

Lately, situations around our house have left me thinking, "This is the stuff only cockroaches survive." My THIS is motherhood - everyday life - or more specifically our lives. Jon and Kate had one thing right, "It may be a crazy life, but it's our life." We have spent the better part of the last two weeks in meetings at school and at specialists to come up with some plans to help Alex be his best. It is a constant balancing act between picking your battles instead of fighting over every issue, and being tactful and assertive instead of being offensive and demeaning.

Picture me as a street performer at Mallory Square in Key West. Who knows why, but I have decided to spin plates. Oh, how I would love to be in Mallory Square right now!

Plate one - advocating for my child's education. It's a swirly plate representing lunch recess, speech therapy and school lunch. I want Alex to be happy and enjoy life. I truly do not care about how smart he is, but I do expect the school to do what they can to help him do his best. They think I am an overachiever who can't handle the fact that my son might be average. BTW - the THEY is his teachers at our public school.

So add in another plate. I see the shortcomings of his current education yet my husband teaches for the same school district. As my son fake farts in my face, which he learned at school, I can't help but complain all the while I am using their pay to provide a roof over our head!

Plate three - my husband coaches varsity basketball. It is a little known fact, but everyone in the world knows more about basketball than the coach, and they are quite happy to say so. Last Thursday, I was sandwiched between my husband's team (we sit right behind the bench) and some loud angry fans from the other team. Alex was clinging to my lap usually crying because his dad was yelling at the guys, or he was hungry or he wanted to go on a walk. My hands were pressed firmly over hears the WHOLE time. The fans behind us spent most of their time criticizing my husband to the point where I was going to have to confront them. I said a silent prayer asking God to help them be quiet or to give me the courage I needed. Fortunately, I didn't have to say anything, but I am not going to let some stranger put down my son's father in front of him. Ironically, we sit behind the bench because it is the best place to avoid most of the criticism.

Plate four - dishes, cooking, cleaning, paying bills all to be done in the four free hours I have while my son is at school.

Plate five - stress eating. I could really use some comfort food to help me balance all of these other plates, but if I eat enough chocolate to make all of this other stuff right, I will not have any clothes to wear!

Plate six - exercise would really help me deal with some of this stress, but plate four is really tricky and takes a lot of time to balance.

Plate seven - I really just want to have fun with my child. I want to bake cookies and play with toys. I want to teach him to read and blow bubbles in the house. Yet, everyday life creeps in. We get up late and are rushing for school. Before 8:30 on most days I am apologizing to him or he is apologizing to me. He will only be five once, and he now has to ability to remember things! I only get one shot to make this a fun time in his life. Yet, I can't bake cookies everyday. See plate five!

Plate eight - my taxes have not started figuring themselves, so I guess I need to work on that too!

Plate nine - money. I am so lucky to stay at home, but that means money is really tight right now. A quick fix to a lot of our problems would be a little more cash. I could buy more clothes if I ate too much chocolate. I could hire my own speech therapist. I could pay for a personal trainer to help me work off the chocolate, and so on and so on.

Plate ten - my Norton antivirus software has expired and is holding all of my online passwords hostage! I need to pay my bills online but can't remember my log in ID or password. I can buy the new version of Norton, but I am waiting until it goes on sale, see plate nine. Must call bank soon!

I can share this with you because I know all of you are also keeping a handful of plates spinning above your heads too. Some of our plates are different, some are the same. Some of us have very large heavy plates that threaten to crush our families. For you, I am saying extra big prayers that you can keep those plates spinning for as long as it takes. I am thankful that my plates are small and manageable, but I am still tired. I am like a salmon constantly swimming upstream, and I just want to stop and enjoy the swim for a while.

Now, I am trying to learn how to drop some of these plates. On Saturday, I went out for a day alone just to be by myself. I went shopping in Iowa and had to cross a very scary bridge to get there. I had a great day, and it was great to forget about the plates for just a short time.

Love Lift Us Up Where We Belong, Where the Eagles Cry...

"Even the youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

~ Isaiah 40:30-31
One of our favorite winter pastimes has been watching the eagles. We live about 10 miles from a beautiful Lock and Dam on the Mississippi River. Each January and February, the eagles migrate here because the open water from the dam enables them to fish. Some years, people have counted over 600 eagles in the immediate area. On our side of the river, there are usually only about 10-15. We love watching them soar.

This is a frozen wetland between the river and the path we take through the woods. Mom, see how much land is between us and the Mississippi River? The river is on the far right, and our trail is on the far left on the other side of the trees. She has been afraid for weeks that we would slip and fall in to the frozen water. I guess Moms never quit worrying no matter how old their children are.

The last time we went, the snow had melted and then froze over again. Our trail was a solid sheet of ice. My husband and son had a ball sliding on the ice.

I love this picture of the outhouse. Let's hope I will never have to use it!

Here is another shot of an eagle. My camera is very basic, so this is about as close and detailed as I can get. On our first trip to the dam, we met a man who drove down from Chicago. He had a GIANT camera. He was a professional. The last time we were there, we met a man who flew all the way from California just to see our eagles.

So does anybody have any eagle questions? dam questions? :) Sorry, I couldn't resist!

One More Random Thought

I am sorry for posting on today - not my day but someone else's. I just remembered my one other random thought.

8. Have you seen the ads for American cheese professing how great it is, and that it is a cheese Americans can be proud of? Really, do we collectively as a nation want to be known for American cheese? Sure, our kids probably eat their weight in it each year, but as far as cheese goes, is American the taste and quality that we want to be known for?

Random Thoughts

We interrupt this regularly scheduled post to bring you some random thoughts. Due to the snow storm last week and a 4 1/2 day weekend, I haven't had a lot of alone time lately. As a result, you should not expect this post to be profound or insightful. I will, however, share with you a few of the random thoughts floating around in my head.

1. Kids seem to move at only two speeds - slower than you would like and faster than you would like.

2. The Dave Matthews Band formed 20 years ago - in 1990. Let this sink in for a minute. Hey, wait, I remember their first album. That was in 1990, hmmm, but 1990 was just a few years ago. They can't be that old. They're too cool to be old. Pause to do math in head - then to quote Penny from The Big Bang Theory, "Holy crap on a cracker." 1990 was 20 years ago. Wait a minute, that would make me.......almost 20 years out of high school?!

3. This weekend we were waiting at a gas station to, of all things, get gas. All of the pumps were full, so we were waiting behind this car. The man pumped the gas and went into pay. After waiting five minutes, we noticed there was a lady sitting in the drivers seat just sitting there! She just kept waiting and waiting. Finally, some of the pumps on the other side opened so we went over there while she continued to wait. After they finally decided to move, they needed to get air in their tires. I really wanted to block them in for about 10 minutes, but of course I would never do that. Wouldn't that have been funny? I have a really dark alter-ego, but I do my best to keep her hidden.

4. A mother's love is fierce and is exemplified in a mother sea turtle. She treks, voyages and journeys across the open seas year after year to return to the same beach to lay her eggs.

5. Lately I find myself saying everything twice to doctors, teachers at school and even friends. I am not sure why that is, but it seems like I am saying everything twice :).

6. Per Psychology Today in a 2004 study, the average woman uses 7,000 words per day. I am convinced that we are only repeating the same few words over and over: No, Stop, Please, Don't and Potty (not necessarily in that order).

7. Finally, if you would like to feel better about yourself, make sure to check out Celebrity Fit Club on VH1. This season stars Bobby Brown, K-Fed, and Sebastian Bach.

Since this post lacks wisdom, motherly advice or tips for better living, please feel free to share with the group. Happy Monday!

The Relativity of Time

"To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven."

~ Ecclesiastes 3:1

Alex Update

A few months ago, I posted about my son's special needs. If you missed that post, the short story is Alex was adopted from Russia and has been diagnosed with FAS (Fetal Alcohol Syndrome). This means that he has organic brain damage because his birthmother drank when she was pregnant with him. I chose to share Alex's story to make me accountable. Alex was diagnosed in May of 2008, and 18 months later, I was still in denial. I was actually still searching for another diagnosis for him.

Now that I have accepted this diagnosis, we are on the path to a happier life, and because I am researching the correct syndrome, I am actually finding some things that work. The organic brain damage for Alex means that he has difficulty with transitions, impulsiveness and distraction. My telling him most anything verbally is usually counterproductive. He can hear what I say, but the message is fragmented and lost as it travels through his brain. This simple picture schedule and clock have made our mornings far more peaceful. The only catch is that Alex is a very concrete thinker. We eat breakfast at 7:15. He will not see 7:16 as also time to eat breakfast. We eat breakfast only at 7:15. (If you have seen Rainman - Ray's Judge Wapner at 4:00 requirement is a great visual of this.) Fortunately, I quickly learned that I can reset the clock to match the time needed.

Our clock now travels with us wherever we go. Last week, for the first time ever, we left the Target toy department without one single tear or complaint. He was so quiet that none of the other shoppers knew we were leaving. It has taken me way too long to realize that most of our battles are due to a lack of understanding not defiance.

Many people respond to me with, "All kids have trouble with transitions," or "my son is also impulsive and he is fine," or "He's a just a boy." They try to console me and help me feel better. On the contrary, it makes me feel worse. Blanket statements like this minimize our challenges and take away from Alex's successes. Denying the syndrome doesn't make it go away. Believe me, I have tried.

So, in our near future, I am hoping for a more peaceful child who can be calm because I helped him feel comfortable and safe. I am looking forward to trying to increase his attention span, and we will be working on improving eye contact. And just in case you are worried, I will not be pursuing a career as an illustrator - yet :).

If you would care to learn more about FAS, I would recommend Fantastic Antone Succeeds!: Experiences in Educating Children with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome Edited by Judith Klienfeld and Siobhan Wescott.

Sleep

"I can lie down and sleep in peace for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety."
~ Psalm 4:8

When I was little, I was afraid of EVERYTHING: coyotes, kidnappers, bank robbers, wild dogs, and aliens to name a few. I would wake up in the middle of the night and be so afraid. My Bible back then had a concordance, so I would sit in the bathroom and look up verses on fear.

As an adult, I am often awake in the middle of the night but now it is usually because my child is afraid. My trivial fears from my youth have been replaced by one gigantic one: I may never get another full night's sleep as long as I live! Sometimes when I can't sleep, I try to use my time wisely and pray for some of my close friends in need. On nights like those, I comfort myself by thinking that God specifically woke me up to lift that person up in prayer. On other nights, when I am not moved by the Spirit, I watch QVC. It is about the only thing on at 4:00 am. What do you do when you can't sleep? Are enough of us awake to schedule a Motley chat session in the dark early hours?

Stranger Danger

So dear friends, what should I do about the jerk who is stalking my cell phone? For over two weeks now, some guy has been calling my phone to harass me. The first time I answered, he asked me something very crude, so I hung up the phone. The next time he called, I didn't answer, so he only called four times that day. The very next day he called, I answered and hung up without saying anything so he would know I was not going to talk to him. That really made him mad, so he called my phone over ten times that day. They are usually back to back calls. I guess he prefers one concentrated spell of annoyance instead of equally distributing the drama. The call comes in as "Restricted," so I called my cell phone company to see if they could help. They can't see his number either, so their best suggestion was to restrict my phone calls to people in my contact list. This sort of works. If someone not on my list calls, I do not know they are calling, and they do have the ability to leave a message. I do not get alerts that I have a message. Today, I had a message from someone looking for Heather because her rent check is late. He didn't leave a number, and I can't call him back to tell him he has the wrong number because my phone will not keep a record of the call. So, I turned off the restriction to see if he would call back, and within hours, my stalker had called. He kept calling and calling as I quickly turned my re-restricted my calls.

I am pretty sure this is harmless, just irritating, but how do I really know? This person has never called my home phone and probably doesn't even know who I am, but I am still bothered. I am even more concerned that it is still going on. What should I do? Do I change my phone number? Do I contact the police? What do you think?

Renewal

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day."
~2 Corinthians 4:16

Ironically, I was going to post this last week, but I was too sick to get off of my couch, but better late than never. These are the vitamins I take everyday. They don't upset my stomach, don't cost a fortune, and don't taste too bad on the way down. I first bought them because of their high vitamin B levels, and I really do feel better when I take these on a regular basis. A few days ago, I was reading the box and realized that they also contain Ginseng, which has "naturally occurring ginsenosides and flavonoids, bioactive factors that play a role in well-being." No wonder I felt better.

Sadly, taking these vitamins everyday is about the only thing I make sure to do for myself every day (unless you count drinking coffee - which is full of antioxidants). Even on days when Alex is in school, I don't make time to exercise, fix myself a nice lunch, study my Bible or even rest! Are any of you successful at taking care of yourself? Do you have any tips for those of us who aren't? What do you do to renew yourself daily? I'd love to hear about it!

Spending Money

"Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Will he not first sit down and estimate the cost to see if he has enough money to complete it?"
~ Luke 14:28

My friend Lindsay, and fellow Motley Mom, let me borrow a few of her Dave Ramsey books before I left Florida. Her family follows Dave's plan to be debt free, and I was so excited to learn more. Dave gives readers baby steps to become debt free, and I am so drawn to him because he is a Christian.

One of the first things I learned from Lindsay and Dave is to pay cash for everything excluding monthly bills. Before, I always used my check card for any and every purchase: McDonald's sausage and egg McMuffin - $2.58, Starbucks tall decaf peppermint mocha - $3.85, GNO at movies - $8.75. Ironically, I was also always afraid to check my bank balance online. I dreaded writing down all of the deductions and I lived in constant fear that an expenditure was forgotten. Spending like this also enabled me to be blissfully unaware of how much we actually spent each month at Starbucks, the grocery store and even on gas.

I do have to spend some time each month budgeting how our money left after paying bills should be spent, but I am so thankful to have money left after paying bills! Grocery shopping has been the biggest challenge for me. I budget $50 per week, which is a challenge alone. Paying cash forces me to keep a total of how much is in my cart, and I forces me to make some tough decisions like, "Do I really want to spend $4.00 on 2 pounds of boneless skinless chicken breasts or would I rather get 4 pounds of split breasts for $4.00?"

Paying with cash is a great way to start tracking your spending. I use an envelope like this, filled with smaller envelopes.



My categories are: fun and farmers market, babysitter, hair care, toiletries, clothing, Walgreen's, prescriptions, co-pays, gas and oil, repairs and tires, groceries, cleaning, entertainment, Starbucks and restaurants. I am planning to add an emergencies envelope to have a few extra dollars for things forgotten or unplanned, like school fundraisers.

Like most new years, I am hoping this year will bring our family more prosperity, but this year, I actually have a plan to make that happen. What money saving goals or tips do you have for the new year?

Over-Extended Christmas

This year our Christmas was less like Norman Rockwell and more like Rocky and Bullwinkle. The three Carvers left our house on Wednesday, drove eight hours to southern Indiana, and spent a day and a half with my husband's family. On Christmas day, we again loaded up the family truckster to drive four hours to my parents. One short day and a half later, we packed up all of our goods and spent seven hours driving the four-hour trip back to our house through a winter storm.

We still have to purchase and open our gifts, and I still have Christmas cards to mail! I even have a few more things I need to finish making! Alex is strung out from eating his weight in food additives and preservatives, and I am too shell-shocked to even decide when Santa should leave his gift for Alex.

Last year, we celebrated our Christmas on the Orthodox Christmas in January because we were traveling and that is when most Russians celebrate Christmas. That way we could incorporate some of Alex's Russian heritage. While that is a good plan, I am wondering if Alex is missing out on something by not being at his own home for Christmas...?

The only thing I know for sure is that I can NEVER celebrate Christmas like this again. Does anyone have good ideas for balancing Christmas with extended families who live out of town? I hope your Christmas was merry and bright no matter where you were, and I would love to hear your ideas - good or bad :)

Lights of the Season

Our small town does a great job of lighting up our cold winter nights. I hope you all have a warm, wonderful Christmas filled with love.

"But the Angel said to them, 'Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. " Luke 2:10-11

"When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said,'I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.'" John 8:12

For the Love of Santa

Alex first saw Santa after being in our country for only two weeks, and he was instantly drawn to him. We were still cocooning, and we weren't really supposed to let anyone else hold him, but Alex reached out for the kind old sole. We celebrate Santa, or more accurately stalk him each holiday season. As Alex grows, I hope to teach him that God gave us his greatest gift, Jesus, on Christmas Day. In that spirit, just as Santa gives gifts, we share our love with others by giving gifts for Christmas. I found a reprint of the infamous letter from dear little Virginia at http://www.newseum.org/yesvirginia/, and I thought you might enjoy reading it again today.

"DEAR EDITOR: I am 8 years old.
"Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus.
"Papa says, 'If you see it in THE SUN it's so.'
"Please tell me the truth; is there a Santa Claus?

"VIRGINIA O'HANLON.
"115 WEST NINETY-FIFTH STREET."

VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except [what] they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if they did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.

You may tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.

The answer was written by veteran newsman Francis Pharcellus Church, and was originally printed in the New York's Sun as an unsigned editorial Sept. 21, 1897.

* SNOW *

"Nature has no mercy at all. Nature says. "I'm going to snow. If you have on a bikini and no snowshoes, that's tough. I am going to snow anyway."

~ Maya Angelou

"To live anywhere in the world today and be against equality because of race or color is like living in Alaska and being against snow."

~William Faulkner

"The future lies before you, like paths of pure white snow. Be careful how you tread it, for every step will show."

~ Unknown

"I frequently tramped eight or ten miles through the deepest snow to keep an appointment with a beech-tree, or a yellow birch, or an old acquaintance among the pines."

~ Henry David Thoreau

"Once people start throwing wet stuff, I go inside."

~ Stephanie Meyer (Twilight)

Breaking News: Jesus Releases Heaven's Best Loved List

Well, maybe it isn't breaking news, but I have uncovered an interview between Jesus and his disciples from over 2000 years ago. We join the group as the disciples are questioning Jesus.


D: Who will be the greatest (your best friends, your peeps, your posse) in the kingdom of Heaven?


J: (Taking a little child to stand beside him) Whoever welcomes this little child in my name, welcomes me; and whoever welcomes me, welcomes the one who sent me. I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

(Paraphrased from Matthew 18:2 and Luke 9:48)

Granola Bars

"Mother-love is not inevitable. The good mother is a great artist ever creating beauty out of chaos."

~ Alice Randall

This afternoon, Alex and I were making some homemade granola bars for him to take to school for snacks. I had visions of him helping me measure and poor, and toast and coat, but the reality was a little different than I pictured. Still, we do have granola bars, we did spend time in the same room, and we did not argue. We have success!

Alex "helping" me in the kitchen.

The granola bars are pretty easy, and I got the recipe from joyfulabode.com. I have tried a few other recipes from her site, and they are delicious.

As usual, I didn't have exactly all of the ingredients in her recipe, so I improvised. I toasted:
2 cups oats
1 cup sunflower seeds
1 cup pecans
A handful or more of coconut flakes

Her recipe calls for wheat germ, which I have never used and do not keep on hand. I have made these bars twice without it, and they still taste great! She recommends toasting the dry ingredients at 400 degrees. I, of course, almost burnt mine while I was getting the sauce together, so I turned the oven down to 350.

For the sauce:
2/3 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup honey
4 tablespoons butter
2 teaspoons vanilla
1/2 teaspoon salt

Mix these ingredients and cook over medium heat until they simmer. Well, this time, I only had about 1/4 cup of honey, so I used all of that and a full cup of brown sugar. Again, this worked for our bars.

Resulting chaos

She recommends adding dried fruit to the bars, which would be delicious. Since I didn't have any dried fruit, I did what any good mom would do. I added marshmallows and miniature Hershey Kisses! I think Alex's teacher will be really glad snack time is at the very end of the day.

Finally, some help with the granola bars.

I must say I feel a little like the little red hen! He is cute though. It reminds me of a line from one of my husband's favorite movies, Blazing Saddles. BTW, if you haven't ever watched the movie, you must know it is unbelievably crude - not a kid's movie.

"Y'know, Nietzsche says 'Out of chaos comes order.'"

~ Howard Johnson

Half Full or Half Empty

So many parenting situations can leave us scratching our head wondering if that really did just happen to us and why didn't anyone warn us it could happen. At some point, we must decide do we yet again take the high road and look at all of our wonderful blessings, or do we lay down in a pile of slobber, pooh, dirty clothes and crunched up Froot Loops and give up. Here are some of the situations I have been pondering over coffee this week.

Pooh in the Back-Pack
Last week, my dear, sweet son had an accident at school. There are several down sides to this story. It was his first solid accident at school. His teacher was at a conference, so he had a sub. I am still not exactly sure why or how it happened, but the dirty underwear came home to us with pooh in tow!!! Let me just tell you, it was a BIG accident. After doing some extensive research, I have sadly found that a very few people think it is acceptable to send everything home in accidents like these. After several meetings at the school to discuss the accident from several different angles, I am ready to look at this as the cup is half full, and here is why. Alex refused to let a stranger clean him up. (This fact alone caused most of my meetings.) Alex has never met a stranger, and is very friendly. I often worry about him walking off with the next person that offers him candy. At the end of the week, I was thankful that he does have boundaries.

I'm so Alone
For the last four years, I have spent almost every waking moment (and many sleeping ones too) with my dear son. I have tried to spend enough time with him so that I could send him off to school and not wonder where his childhood went. Now that he is in school, I am alone for five hours every week day. I have so much alone time that I have had really scary thoughts, like maybe I should get a job. I'm going to have to look at this new phase in my life as half full too. Even though I don't yet know what I am going to do with my time, I am lucky to have so many options ahead of me.

Raking Leaves
The weather last week was super nice here; our highs were in the mid 60s. It was sunny and warm, so I spent several days outside raking the leaves from our yard. Our town doesn't have a leaf drop off area, so to get rid of the leaves, we must burn them. We have actually never burnt leaves before, but we found it to be great fun! We made the back end of our driveway the designated burn pile, so all of the leaves needed to be drug, dropped or raked there. My husband is big and strong, so he chose to load the leaves in a box and carry them to the fire. When I was home alone, I was working out a method to move the entire pile like a large snowball. Since we skipped fall last year, I had forgotten a few facts about leaf raking. First, whether you have a cat or even see a cat, you will at some point find cat pooh in your leaves. You will usually find it by stepping in it. I found mine while I was in the middle of my giant pile. After some emotional exercising and hem hawing, I have decided to look at leaf raking as half full too. On the one hand, pooh stinks no matter where you find it. On the other hand, we all had so much fun jumping in the leaves and even watching them burn. I was also very thankful that I didn't have to worry about snakes in the leaves because it is so cold where we live.

So what has life handed you this week, and can you see it as half full or half empty?

Important Warning about Halloween Candy

Dear Motley Moms,

I have very sad news for you as you face another week of changing diapers, fixing meals, and scrubbing toilets. As you sip your morning coffee or hot chocolate and contemplate play dates, sports practices, and grocery lists, you might be tempted to dig through your child's candy bag, but don't! The candy isn't safe!! Even though you only took your children to safe places and checked the candy for foreign objects like arsenic and razors, there is danger lurking in that orange plastic pumpkin. Carbs are the enemy and too much sugar will make you fat. I have searched high and low to test my hypothesis, and I have found proof from Mother Nature herself.

Silver Maple

Red Maple

Sugar Maple

Happy Monday :)

Still Thankful

"Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you,

will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."

~Philippians 1:6

Tomorrow and Wednesday will be the fourth anniversary of Alex's adoption!! For seven long years, I was angry, depressed and confused. I didn't understand why God would give me such a strong desire for children when I couldn't get pregnant. I wanted to be graceful and a witness for God, but it was difficult. Since I spent those seven years begging God for a child, I think it is only fair that I spend seven more praising Him for our wonderful gift. God did have a plan for all of us even when we couldn't see it. His timing is impeccable. If we had been in any other order on that referral list, we might have been sent home with someone else's child!

If you are facing stress, sorrow or hardship, don't give up. If you find yourself in despair today, hang on and wait. God is still there even if you can't see him. I hope your storm is over soon. Just remember, you will some day see the completion of the good work God has started in your life.

Food Snob & a Great Pumpkin Recipe (not to be Confused with THE Great Pumpkin)

As a SAHM, one of my most important jobs is preparing delicious, healthy, home cooked meals for my family on shoestring budget. As a girl who stess-eats and loves carbs, I also know that if you look hard enough, you can find a diet that justifies almost any food. Well, I have found THE exception.

On Saturday, we ate lunch out at a fast food place (Gasp!). This is a rare treat for us for lots of reasons. First, all three of us usually do not agree on where to go. Strangely enough, Alex loves McDonald's. It seems like kids are innately born with few instincts, but one of them seems to be a love of Happy Meals. Ironically, I just noticed a few weeks ago that McDonald's is a proud sponsor of Sesame Street. You bet they are.

Second, we try to avoid artificial preservatives, flavors and food colors in Alex's diet. I have also declared war on high fructose corn syrup. Yes, I know it is all natural, and I do live in the heartland of corn production. At the risk of offending corn farmers, many of whom are our good friends, I hate corn syrup. Our bodies are not made to metabolize it, and I blame corn syrup for my extra pounds around my waistline, the decline in our economy and poor test scores among elementary students in Sheboygan. OK, I actually only blame corn syrup for my five extra pounds.

Third, my husband is at high risk for cancer, and I have a 75% of dying of a heart attack, so I try to fix meals that are low in fat and high in fruits and vegetables. I have recently declared war on white flour too, so I am paying an arm and a leg for whole grain wheat bread with no added high fructose corn syrup or artificial anythings. The extra money I spend could be used to send a ton of white flour to hungry children in another country. Although I really like eating like this, my husband has come to accept it as his lot in life. He loves cheeseburgers and french fries, buffalo chicken wings and egg rolls. If it is fried, it is his favorite.

So on Saturday, we all agreed to eat at a Long John Silver's/A&W combo restaurant. Long John Silvers is one of my guilty pleasures, and Charlie loves his cheeseburgers. Alex was super happy to see a statue in the checkout line, so we had a winner! I tried to fight the temptation as I ordered, but I was weak. I asked for a side order of crispies. I sat down at the table and looked at my small order of crispies staring back at me, and I smiled in delight. I wondered how many calories could be in that small cardboard square. I thought about although they were fried, which is OK for Atkins, they were essentially fried flour, probably my nemesis - white flour! I have to say they were delicious, and I am really proud of myself for not eating the whole serving! I actually threw away almost a whole teaspoonful.

Today, I am back on the wagon again - taking my vitamins, drinking 64 ounces of water, and eating my 5-11 servings of fruits and vegetables. We have been trying to add some fall favorites to our menus this season, and here is a great soup recipe you might like too. It calls for cubed, peeled pie pumpkin, so the canned pumpkin will not due. I don't know if it is jut my knives, but I have the worst time cutting up pumpkin, so I usually take the top off, scoop out the seeds and then bake it in the oven at 350 for 30-40 minutes. This will let you cut, chop or puree it with ease. I found this recipe at a Kathy's Pumpkin Patch in eastern Iowa, and it is really good.

Autumn Soup
4 bacon strips, diced
1/4 c cup chopped onion
2 cups cubed peeled pie pumpkin
2 cups chicken broth
1 can diced tomatoes, undrained
1 teaspoon curry powder
3/4 cup cubed cooked chicken
1/3 cup frozen corn
1/3 cup cooked small pasta shells

In a large saucepan, cook the bacon and onion over medium heat until the bacon is crisp; drain. Add the pumpkin, broth, tomatoes, and curry; bring to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer for 8-10 minutes or until the pumpkin is tender (if using raw pumpkin). Stir in the chicken, corn, and pasta; heat through.

Enjoy!