1. Sometimes I pretend I can't hear my children. I have been known to hide in their room when they're playing elsewhere so I can read.
2. I let them watch TV. Lots of TV. Probably 2-3 hours a day. The big one watches 2 episodes of Dora (or, lately, Curious George) every day while he eats lunch, before he goes to take a nap. In my defense, it's all stuff I approve of and it's DVR'd so I fast-forward through the commercials.
3. I let the baby eat goldfish that dropped in the dirt at the playground. I did draw the line at the ant-covered ones.
4. Usually I (or my husband) end up cleaning up most of the toys at night. I feel bad making Ethan pick up stuff Micah has strewn all over the house and Micah is too little to understand cleaning up just yet.
5. I get them a cookie almost every time we go to Publix, even if our trip there is so short they are still eating the cookie when we leave the store.
6. I got my oldest to not be scared of pooping in the big toilet by encouraging him to laugh at the "plop" sound it made.
7. My oldest gets on food kicks where he eats the same thing for lunch for weeks on end. Right now we're on Dora soup. I don't try to get him to eat anything else. It's got carrots in it!
8. Yesterday when I found the baby sitting in the middle of the dining room table, AGAIN, I took a picture of him to post to Facebook before I got him down. I'm sure that will do wonders to discourage his climbing.
9. During Ethan's preschool singing program, a kid was pushing him and not playing, either. When he pushed the kid back in retaliation, I had to physically restrain myself from cheering him on. I want him to defend himself.
10. I let my oldest pee outside instead of coming in to go to the bathroom. Consequently, when we were on our preschool field trip to the farm and everyone was milling about waiting to go in, he dropped trou and started to pee on the ground right there in front of God and everybody. I moved him to another, more secluded patch of grass so at least he wouldn't splash anyone. Then I noticed the bathrooms about 50 yards away. Oops!
I'm a shoo-in for Mother of the Year!