...because we all have our motley moments!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Mother's Day

We'll be celebrating Mother's Day on Sunday.

I have mixed feelings about this day. It's nice because I am a mother and so I get a special day to celebrate it with my family. It's a little hard because my mother passed away when I was 19 and my stepmom lives far away. My mother-in-law lives closer so we usually see her sometime on that day.

Because my mom died a while ago, I protect myself by not thinking about her too much. I have gotten really, really good at just not thinking about painful thoughts. Is that healthy? I don't know. It works for me. Father's day is about the same too. My dad died four years ago. We celebrate with my father-in-law on that day. The problem with these holidays is that they dredge-up all these feelings that are "in-check" the rest of the year (except other major holidays and birthdays).

I'm gonna use this as my little psycho-therapy session, OK?

How do you guys feel about these holidays? Are they peaches and cream for you? Are they full of thorns? A little of both?

I really don't have any great insight this week. I just wanted to vent.

On Sunday, we'll celebrate with a nice breakfast out and cards for me to read. I'll spend the day saying "It's my choice (to do whatever) because it's MY special day!". Then, I'll probably have a little cry session sometime towards the end of the night and my hubby will again comfort me as he always tries to do. Then, I'll wake up on Monday morning and be kind of relieved the day has passed, yet happy that I have a little family that loves and cares about me.

With that, I hope all you moms out there have a wonderful Mother's Day. Whatever your issues, I wish you all the best!

Happy Mother's Day!


Donna said...

Thanks, Maria! Happy Mother's Day to you, too!

I think you honor your mother's memory every day that you spend raising and nurturing your own little family. You do a great job!

And we all need to have a good cry now and then...it's very cathartic!

avagdro said...

Thank you so much Maria for sharing.My mentor always says to those who lose their dear ones...to cherish them in their hearts.Its so great way to honor parents indeed.Wish you n all a Happy Mothers day.

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Liz said...

I could honestly take it or leave it. It's right in between my birthday and my anniversary, which are more important to me. We usually spend time with my mom and my MIL. Father's Day is just about my husband, which is nice, but bittersweet, too, as we lost my FIL 2 years ago and my dad a few months after that.
Happy Mother's Day to you, Maria, and the rest of you moms out there!

Pam said...

How to say this nicely...I hate Mother's Day for two reasons. 1) For several years, I wanted desparetly to be a mom, but was not physically able. Infertility is bad enough without going to church on Mother's Day and not getting a geranium or other flower of choice because I didn't have a child. I think churches should ignore these days and that would help a lot. I am still a little bitter about all of our struggles, and Mother's Day is the worst reminder of them. I am so blessed now to have Alex, but God doesn't answer everyone's prayer for a child the way mine was. I also think it stinks for unmarried girls who haven't found their mate yet. 2) Everyone's mother will someday pass on, so when my mom passes, I will dread the day even more.

I am sorry to be such a downer, but I really just hate this holiday. I think mom's are awesome hard workers and deserve to be celebrated everyday, so to my mom friends, please don't let my negatives take away from how hard it is to be a mom, or let them understate that you are doing God's work by caring for your family!

Maria said...

Thanks for writing your responses. I appreciate all of them!

Karly said...

It seems like on this earth Joy and Pain are close companions. It's like you can't have one without the other. Especially when it comes to holidays. They conjure up mountains of joy and depths of pain.

Maria, I often think of you on Mother's Day. I know it must be a difficult day for you in some ways. I am so glad you get away and celebrate the day with your family at the beach. That is a great tradition!

Maria said...

Thank you Karly!

Lindsay said...

I am blessed to not only have my mom and MIL still with us, but also both of my grandmothers. But with that being said. Our anniversary is also this time of year (it's May 13th), and in the past my lovly hubby has really only choosen to "celebrate" one of the two "special days". So my petty side is frequently irritated.........lol

Lita said...

Holidays are bittersweet, aren't they? They are celebrations, but when it's impossible to celebrate with someone who you love deeply and loves you deeply back, it's impossible to fully enjoy without some tears! For Father's Day I used to bake something sweet and go to the cemetary to "talk" to my dad(While my mom is still around, my dad passed away when I was 15.) Now I try to set aside some quiet time to "talk" to him now. Not every day, but when I feel I'm losing my center, I find a tiny bit of quiet and remember him. They live on in us, you know? And from the little time I have spent talking to you, I know you must have had a WONDERFUL MOTHER. Just like you.
I hope that on mother's day you enjoy time with your beautiful daughters and hard-working husband. I pray it will not be too windy. Hee hee ;-)

Maria said...

Thank you everyone! I appreciate you all so much. You make me laugh... You make me cry... Thank you!